Tonight is Conan O’Brien’s last night on The Tonight Show and he exits with a $45-million parachute. Meanwhile, Jay Leno and David Letterman have renewed their long quiet feud. Letterman:

I’m telling jokes and making fun of Jay Leno over and over and over, relentlessly, mercilessly simply for one reason. I’m really enjoying it.

Leno:

Letterman has been hammering me every night. You know the best way to get Letterman to ignore you? Marry him. He will not bother you. He won’t look you in the eye.

The real losers? NBC. They screwed up late night on NBC back in 1992 when they bypassed Letterman for Leno as host of The Tonight Show. Letterman skipped to CBS but Leno won the subsequent ratings war. This time, NBC loses O’Brien and $45-million.

From Charlie’s Diary (Charlie Stross):

There are several good arguments for not using Apple’s computers. For one thing, they’re expensive; no cheap netbooks here. If money was all there was to it, I’d stick to generic cheap PCs — and indeed, I have run PCs in the past.

Are Mac’s more expensive? No. But Mac’s are not cheap devices, either.

The reason I choose to pay through the nose for my computers is very simple: unlike just about every other manufacturer in the business, Apple appreciate the importance of good industrial design.

Remember coffee before Starbucks? Coffee used to cost pennies, now costs dollars. What did Starbucks do to convince people to drive out of their way, stand in line, wait for coffee to be made, then shell out $4 for the privilege? Mike Elgan thinks Apple is doing the same thing.

Starbucks transformed a generic commodity into a brand-name experience that people seek out. But the miraculous bit is that they changed American (and later, global) culture. Coffee is still coffee. They didn’t change the product as much as they changed the customer.

To move computer users away from the standalone keyboard and standalone screen, Apple introduced the touch screen iPhone. Step One in a series of steps to change popular culture, ala Starbucks.

They’re forcing those of us who want to use an iPhone to accept the on-screen keyboard. Later this year, when the rumored Apple touch tablet is likely to ship, everyone will be so happy with a larger version of the iPhone’s on-screen keyboard. Had they shipped the tablet first, we no doubt would have complained about that keyboard. But since they’ve lowered our expectations with the iPhone keyboard, we’ll love the tablet’s.

I’m not convinced that Apple lowered expectations with the iPhone keyboard. Changed expectations, perhaps. Elgan carries the premise too far, too fast.

I think the initial tablet will feature a 10-inch touch screen. The keyboard will probably span the screen. Then they’ll ship a 13-inch tablet. Then a 15-inch. By the time they ship a 27-inch desktop touch tablet (used at an angle like a drafting board), we’ll be just giddy with excitement about how wonderful the on-screen keyboard is.

Sorry. That won’t happen. Touch screen desktop PCs have been around for 25 years and have yet to make a dent in the market. Why? It’s mouse and hand vs. shoulder, arm, hand, and fingers. The mouse does the same thing and does it easier, better, faster, more precisely (with the exception of standalone kiosks, of course).

Apple led the mob that practically killed off the audio CD by getting us all into the habit of shopping for music in iTunes, rather than at Tower Records. Their tablets will lead a similar attack on renting movies at Blockbuster. Instead, we’ll download movies from Netflix and iTunes via our tablets. I believe they’ll also drive the Huluization of television, which is where TV is something that exists in a searchable online database, and shows will be something you “subscribe” to.

This reminds me of the old Popular Mechanics magazine articles which highlighted future products, most of which never saw the light of day. Subscriptions? Don’t we have that with Cable TV already? Music subscriptions haven’t exactly taken the download world by storm, either.

But the iPhone, and later the tablet will change our thinking on software even further. Rather than thinking of a software application as some massive, do-everything product, we’ll increasingly view software as apps, widgets or small features that are cheap and instantly available all the time. We’re already experiencing this with the iPhone. It’s getting to the point where its easier to download an app than find one already installed on your own phone.

We’ve been buying software online for many years. That’s not new, but Apple’s App Store makes the process wonderful on the iPhone. Will Apple move the same model to the iTablet device? That’s a given.

Five years from now, your PC will be an all-touch, no-keyboard giant tablet that replaces your cable box and DVR and facilitates the downloading and installation of software one small feature at a time. Apple is already working on the technology. And—don’t look now—but Apple is working on you, too.

Such prognostications sound plausible. I use my hand and fingers (and thumb) to navigate my iPhone and any one of nearly 180 apps, games, utilities, widgets, yes. But that’s a requirement due to the device’s size. A keyboard for a cell phone, handheld computer, et al, is silly, yes. Even a wireless tablet (think very large iPhone or iPod touch) can get by for multimedia use, and act as an excellent digital magazine, newspaper, or book. Even video and audio conferencing via a tablet seems ready to hatch.

No keyboard or mouse required, right?

Unfortunately, pocket and tablet devices will not replace my Mac or PC, but must learn to peacefully coexist. What about email? Database entry? Reports and documents? Spreadsheets? Graphic design? Multimedia development? Sorry, until voice recognition gets a whole lot better, we’re stuck in the 21st century with 19th century tools—the keyboard. And a 20th century tool. The mouse.

Tablets and pocket-sized devices trade precision and efficiency (try writing an article on an iPhone keyboard) for mobility and convenience. Five years from now we may use handheld devices far more than now, but the new doesn’t easily eliminate the old.

Apple is not training us to use new touch technology to transplant the Mac and PC experience with keyboard, mouse, trackpad, and screen. They’re training us to use new tools in new ways and to buy more of what they make.

If you’re waiting for the latest and greatest new car, wait a little longer. These are the 6 to consider. From CNN Money:

Lincoln MKX: Besides a new, more flowing design with Lincoln’s signature “bow wave” grill, the MKX crossover gets a new 305-horsepower 3.7-liter V6 engine. The MKX will be quieter than competing crossovers from Lexus and Audi, Ford boasts, while being more enjoyable than today’s MKX. Besides the new engine, which you’ll also find under the hood of the new Mustang, the MKX will have a manually shiftable six-speed automatic transmission.

People are waiting for a Lincoln with a Mustang engine? Other on the waiting list:

Honda CR-Z, Ford Focus, Mercedes-Benz E-class Cabriolet, Ford Mustang GT 5.0, and Cadillac CTS-V Coupe.

I think I’ll wait awhile longer.

If you’re a fan of Apple’s highly successful and endearing Get a Mac commercials, AdWeek has them all in one place. From 2006 to the last of 2009.

We know how you love Apple’s “Get a Mac” ads with John Hodgman and Justin Long. So, here are all 66 TV spots (plus the 90-second extended version of 2008’s musical ad “Sad Song”) that have aired since the campaign, created by TBWA Media Arts Lab, launched on May 2, 2006.

Apple did not run any ‘Get a Mac’ commercials during the 2009 holiday period. Is that the last of ‘Get a Mac?’

Just when you thought it was safe to live in your own home, a Santa Fe man who claims to suffer from electromagnetic allergies is suing his neighbor. Why? From the Santa Fe Reporter:

Arthur Firstenberg, the plaintiff, has been sleeping at friends’ homes or in his car to avoid the electromagnetic waves created by his neighbor Raphaela Monribot’s cell phone, wireless network, computer, compact fluorescent lightbulbs and dimmer switches.

Wait. There’s more. And it gets worse. Other residents claim that WiFi internet waves aggravate their electronic allergies, too, and they’re suing to remove all WiFi Hot Spots in the city.

To add merit to their case, they are classifying their “allergy” or “sensitivity” as a disability and are claiming the Americans with Disabilities Act, which prohibits discrimination based on disability.

What if they’re allergic to radio and television waves?

What happens when a designer’s company goes out of business and he becomes unemployed? Etsy and a gallery of stickers for MacBook users.

My favorite:

From Mac360’s review of Evernote, and from my It Pays To Read The Fine Print department comes the Terms of Service agreement at Evernote:

Accordingly, by using the Service and posting Content, you grant Evernote a license to display, perform and distribute your Content, and to modify and reproduce such Content to enable Evernote to operate and promote the Service. (You also agree that Evernote has the right to elect not to accept, post, store, display, publish or transmit any Content in our sole discretion.) You agree that these licenses are royalty free, irrevocable and worldwide, and include a right for Evernote to make such Content available to others with whom Evernote has contractual relationships related to the provision of the Evernote Service, solely for the purpose of providing such services, and to otherwise permit access to your Content to third parties if Evernote determines such access is necessary to comply with its legal obligations.

In other words, when you store your data online using Evernote, they can re-distribute or modify your data any which way and wherever they choose. They wouldn’t, would they?

Football makes for strange bedfellows. And exciting drama. Green Bay Packers’ quarterback Brett Favre retired. Then came out of retirement. Then retired again. Then came out of retirement. Again. Lane Kiffin was hired to run the Oakland Raiders and ran them to a 5-15 record, and a big mess. He was run out of town by team owner Al Davis. Kiffin went to Tennessee for a year. Now he’s gone. Again. Where did Kiffin turn up? Dan Wetzel:

USC, which is facing a multi-sport, department-wide NCAA bloodletting next month, just hired a guy who in his tenure at Tennessee was a walking secondary violation (six of them), had two players booted off the team after an attempted armed robbery and leaves with NCAA investigators looking into how the program used recruiting hostesses. And, of course, he was a Trojan assistant when the compliance trouble USC must answer for began.

A mess at USC, a mess at Oakland, a mess at Tennessee. Let me predict a mess at USC.

It’s just a matter of time before Avatar becomes the highest grossing (most popular) movie ever. The regular movie is stunning. The 3D version only more so. From Movie News & Gossip:

Vatican newspaper and radio station are criticizing James Cameron’s 3-D blockbuster for flirting with the idea that worship of nature can replace religion — a notion the pope has warned against. They call the movie a simplistic and sappy tale, despite its awe-inspiring special effects.

It is simplistic. Avatar is good vs. evil. And the special effects are, well, stunning. From the Vatican newspaper L’Osservatore:

So much stupefying, enchanting technology, but few genuine emotions… Everything is reduced to an overly simple anti-imperialistic and anti-militaristic parable…

No emotions? Didn’t you hate the bad guys and root for the good guys? Remember, it’s a movie, not the Gospel. Vatican Radio:

(It) cleverly winks at all those pseudo-doctrines that turn ecology into the religion of the millennium. Nature is no longer a creation to defend, but a divinity to worship.

Did I mention that Avatar is a movie?

From the Associated Press:

Sarah Palin, former Alaska governor and 2008 Republican vice presidential candidate, will return to her broadcast roots and take her conservative message to Fox News as a regular commentator.

From Sarah Palin:

I am thrilled to be joining the great talent and management team at Fox News. It’s wonderful to be part of a place that so values fair and balanced news.

From me:

I think I’m going to be ill.